


all's well that ends well to end up with you

by sk4di



Category: Pitch Perfect (Movies)
Genre: Chaubrey - Freeform, Christmas, F/F, Fluff, fake dating au, no I can't write another shipp so what, shout out to all 3 chaubrey shippers out there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-18 03:20:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21920947
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sk4di/pseuds/sk4di
Summary: Chloe lied and now Aubrey is her (fake) girlfriend for the holidays - or the chaubrey fake dating AU no one asked for.
Relationships: Chloe Beale/Aubrey Posen
Comments: 9
Kudos: 62





	all's well that ends well to end up with you

**Author's Note:**

> “They slipped briskly into an intimacy from which they never recovered.”
> 
> ― F. Scott Fitzgerald, This Side of Paradise

> **@thechloebeeale** : _I really hate driving thats why I live in new york_
> 
> 12-22-2019 11:56AM

* * *

It’s a little too late to say no when Chloe is already behind the wheel with a large paper cup of tea in the cupholder and the Carpenter’s Christmas album is playing. Aubrey was pretty sure that she didn’t want to know what could happen if she gave up their plan right there. She stared at Chloe as the redhead dropped her deep blue beanie on to her lap.

“What is it?” She asks Aubrey, noticing her stare, as if she knew the thoughts running through the blonde’s head.

“Nothing. I was just wondering if I can take a nap before it’s my turn to drive,” Aubrey lied, rubbing her arms up and down. She didn't feel like sleeping, it was too cold for that anyway.

The car wasn’t still warm enough. Aubrey couldn’t know if it was a problem with the heater or if the outside temperature was making its job impossible.

Chloe raised her brows as if she had forgotten she wouldn’t have to drive all the five hours until her father’s house, that they were in Aubrey’s car and that the blonde could also drive. She offered Aubrey her discarded beanie.

“Sure. We’re barely thirty minutes in. Take a nap, I’ll wake you up, bae.”

Aubrey glared at her, putting the beanie on her head, feeling invaded by the smell of Chloe’s shampoo.

“Alright, sorry. Bae- baby,” Chloe said, smirking.

“I swear to God, if you call me bae in front of your family, they will see a break up,” Aubrey said.

* * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _Who invented the term “BAE” anyway?”_
> 
> 12-18-2019 10:01PM

* * *

It was Aubrey’s only condition when she agreed to be Chloe’s fake girlfriend: do not call me bae.

It’s harder to explain why Aubrey despised the nickname then explain why Chloe needed a girlfriend for Christmas. While it’s complicated to navigate Aubrey’s opinions about the cheesiness of the word and nicknames in general, it’s easy to understand that families can be complicated.

“I need a girlfriend, so I can show him that I’m fine,” was Chloe’s explanation.

Chloe only met her father when she was sixteen and their relationship didn’t spark and shine defying all the odds. They only saw each other twice before her mother’s funeral, a month before she went to Barden. But after that, he seemed determined to fulfill whatever needs Chloe had and be a father figure in her life from now on.

Aubrey thinks Chloe is the sweetest person she has ever met, she knows how much bad behavior is required for her to treat someone coldly; so, she understands her friend’s hesitation about her father. He had a lot of apologies to give about how young and inconsequent he was when she was a child; she had a lot of a past that could never be forgotten and a future she was still unsure if it had a space for him in it.

(With her own issues with her father as experience in the matter, Aubrey would say that this situation was far from perfect, but that at least he was trying.)

In the between, though, they tried to make it work. To be a family. Even if it only meant a few days in the year.

That’s why Chloe begged Aubrey to be her fake girlfriend for Christmas. She couldn’t handle this new overprotective parental figure of hers worrying about her anymore and she needed to show him she was fine, living a normal life and being happy and that yes, being an aspiring playwright for Broadway was a draining and an uncertain career but she was determined to succeed.

And there wasn’t a fastest, less intrusive way to show him that than introducing him to her grounded, serious and successful fake girlfriend: Aubrey Posen.

This plan made sense in Chloe head and Aubrey had to admit that it could work. But she also was aware that accepting that role could be the beginning of a disaster. She couldn’t afford unboxing the feelings for Chloe she had locked down years ago. It was risky, and she would have to make an extra effort to not screw everything up because there was another thing she couldn’t afford: losing Chloe.

But Chloe pleaded. Aubrey said no. Chloe begged on her knees. Aubrey tried to say no definitely and if she hadn’t looked in Chloe’s eyes, she maybe would have been able to. She would do anything if Chloe kept staring at her like that.

“Ask Beca,” Aubrey suggested as last resort but found herself furious with the thought of Beca and Chloe being a couple even if it was a fake one.

“Beca finally agreed to spend Christmas with her own father, I can’t talk her out of it,” Chloe said and made a face. “And I kind of already told them it was you.”

Aubrey sighed loudly. “And what about my plans for Christmas?”

“Are you going to London?” Chloe asked her, referring to the fact that Aubrey’s parents were spending Christmas with one of her older brothers across the ocean.

“No,” Aubrey answered, remembering the eight hours flying she decided to not endure and all the anxiety she avoided with it. “Unless you want to come with me and avoid lying to your father.”

“I’m not lying! I just can’t handle him trying to talk me back into vet school one more time,” she said. “Please, Bree.”

And like that, she was Chloe’s girlfriend for the holidays.

Nothing would really change, she decided, and, in the end, she could go back to denying being in love with Chloe and being afraid of making a move and caging the girl and her free spirit into a relationship.

Because Chloe wasn’t ready for a real girlfriend or boyfriend; Chloe couldn’t do serious at the moment. She was shinning in sync with New York's lights. She had too much love to give around, living in the greatest city in the world and ready to love every single citizen in it.

And Aubrey couldn’t be one more of them; Aubrey was straight to the point in every single aspect of her life, including her infatuation-turned-into-love about her best friend. She would rather live forever wondering how if felt to have Chloe than live forever knowing but never being able to have her again.

But Chloe needed her. And Chloe was asking so very sweetly.

So Aubrey lied. “Alright. I’m okay with it,” Aubrey told her friend. “Just don’t call me bae.”

* * *

“They’ll think I’m doing well, right?” Chloe asked with her eyes on the road. “They know I’m bi so it’s not going be a shock that you're a girl. And we’ll look happy, we are happy. And you're beautiful, smart, a law student. It takes one look at you to know you are put together. And we are going to look aca-awesome.”

“You are not defined by who you are dating, Chlo.” Aubrey told her in a tired tone, bracing herself because of the cold. “Or, in this case, fake dating.”

“I know, I know,” Chloe said. She reached into the backseat and handed Aubrey her hoodie. “I just need to-“

“I get it,” the blonde said, and really meant it. She put the hoodie on and sighed as she felt enveloped by Chloe’s smells once again. Being from the South, cold was still a challenge for her.

She sighed, thinking about what as ahead of her. She was there for Chloe and all the devotion she had for her. And if Chloe needed to give someone a solid (fake) evidence that she wasn’t suicidal or broken or wasting her life with pipe dreams or something like that, she would help her.

The redhead gave her a quick grateful smile. She just needed to make them believe in something Aubrey and she already knew: that she was going to be just fine.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** : _I’m in maine. where are the thirteen of you who live in here?_
> 
> 12-22-2019 5:41PM

* * *

They got to the Wyatt’s household minutes before dinner.

The house was a modern wooden construction located in a large property surrounded by pine trees. It was ten minutes by car away from any other residence (“It’s the perfect scenario for a horror movie, but in a cute way,” Chloe told Aubrey when asked about the place during their trip).

She had been there once in the summer and once during the fall. It was a beautiful view in both, but she was sure that what she was seeing as they got there that evening was her favorite. Winter was far from being her favorite season, but it suited that place perfectly.

“It looks like Derek and Meredith’s dream house,” Aubrey said, turning off the car’s motor.

Chloe felt sorry that Aubrey ended up driving the most part of the trip, reluctant in giving the wheel back to her. It was Aubrey’s way of saying “I listen to you, I care about you" since Chloe despised driving.

“You are done pretending to not watch Grey’s Anatomy anymore, aw.” Chloe smirked at her. “Trivia: stepmonster is a surgeon.”

Aubrey raised her brows at the title. “Look what Beca did to you.”

Chloe laughed remembering their grumpy friend. “I’m kidding. Angela is the nicest.”

It was not weird that she liked her stepmother more than she liked her father. She just didn’t have resentments about Angela; she was neutral, and she was kind.

Her father, on the other hand, was someone who influenced her life in several ways. She was still scared of thinking about how her life would’ve turned if he was present in it.

She didn’t hate him. If she did, she wouldn’t be there to spend Christmas with his family. She just needed her time and he had been rushing things for the last years. Meetings, holidays, concerns and participations. Chloe was beginning to come around the idea of being closer to him, but at the same time, still extremely uncomfortable with the idea of him intruding her life. She could only hope that coming into his house with Aubrey as her girlfriend would give him some kind of distraction.

Also, she hoped poor, sweet, lovely Aubrey wouldn’t get caught in the middle of a crossfire that had nothing to do with her. There wasn’t anyone in the world she would feel safer with than the blonde and there were no words she could use to thank her for doing this.

They got out of the car and opened the trunk. The air was cold and there was a massive layer of snow covering the lawn. Luckily Chloe was aware of how Maine’s weather could be in December and made sure they both had brought everything they needed to endure the cold.

“Are you ready, girlfriend?” Aubrey asked her with a playful smirk, one hand resting against the open trunk and the other against the small of Chloe’s back.

The redhead looked up at the taller woman and grinned. She shoved down the guilty feeling for using Aubrey and said to herself that yes, she was ready to be Aubrey’s girlfriend, even if it’s fake and just for a few days. She could do that, she could be good to Aubrey for those few days.

She heard steps coming in their direction and, in a fluke, got on her toes and kissed Aubrey’s cold cheek: a silent thank you.

“Chloe!” A massive man came in their direction.

Kurt looked like a younger cousin of Santa Claus. He had a brown-turning-white hair, a beard and a contagious smile that was too sweet to fit his manly figure.

Chloe always wondered what her father looked like when she was a child – since her mother wouldn’t talk much about him - or anything al all - she was left alone with her imagination. She was an imaginative child, but she could never create a solid image of her unknown father. She only knew he had to have the same blue eyes as hers, because she couldn’t find that color and shape in anyone from her mother’s side of the family. When she met him, she was content that she got that right.

“How was the trip?” Kurt hugged his daughter briefly.

“It was great, thank you for asking,” Chloe answered him, untypically uncomfortable with a hug. She took a step back to take Aubrey’s hand. “This is Aubrey, my girlfriend.” She couldn’t stop smiling with the words that just left her lips. “Aubrey, this is Kurt.” She couldn’t bring herself to call him dad.

Aubrey shook the man’s hand with her free hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Wyatt. Thank you for having me.”

Chloe was so glad Aubrey understood how she needed to hold her hand, how she needed to feel her. She squeezed the blonde’s hand and smiled down as she received another squeeze back.

“Please, just call me Kurt. Mr. Wyatt makes me feel old. I heard a lot about you, Aubrey,” he said, and Aubrey politely smiled at him. “Let me help you with the bags.”

They picked up their things and walked into the house, following Kurt.

“Hello everyone,” Chloe greeted after Kurt dropped their bags on the foyer and guided them to the dining area.

The house was warm and smelled like homemade cooking. There were family pictures in the walls and the whole interior was heavily decorated for Christmas: a huge pine tree with red and silver ornaments was sitting by the corner of the living room area and mistletoes and bells hanging on the arcs that divided the house. It seemed like a beautiful home to grow up in; everything Chloe wished and didn’t have as a kid.

Two teenage boys and a younger one was busy setting the table for dinner and a brunette middle-aged woman was standing nearby the kitchen entrance with a little girl hiding behind her legs.

“This is Aubrey, my gilfriend,” Chloe said with a soft smile and went on presenting to Aubrey the Wyatts.

She loved saying that, she realized. She was starting to understand why every single man Aubrey ever dated looked so dazzled with her hanging in their arm. Their cocky smiles as they presented her to their peers in a cocktail dress was comprehensible. Chloe couldn’t judge their proud smirks anymore.

The Wyatt kids were all brunettes, like their parents – what made Chloe and Aubrey clearly foreigners between them. Taylor and Sawyer were the two lanky teenage boys, twins, and Chloe still found difficult to tell them apart; Luke was ten but was so small that he looked even younger; Wendy was the youngest of them all and kept hiding behind her mother’s legs for as long as she could. The only thing they shared with Chloe was Kurt’s eyes.

Angela came to hug Chloe and Aubrey too. She also insisted that Aubrey dropped the Mrs. Wyatt and called her by her given name. She was a tall woman with an oval face framed by rimmed glasses and a beautiful afro. She asked about the trip, just like her husband and told them dinner was ready and that they got in just in time.

Chloe leaned against Aubrey just a little bit, feeling lighter, relieved at how easy their stay was going to be.

She never dated anyone worthy of following all the steps. And even if she did, there was no home to take them to. And now there she was, hand in hand with Aubrey, doing all of it. It felt right somehow. If there was anyone in the world that could make this appetizing for Chloe, this someone was Aubrey, her beautiful, caring, secretly sweet best friend.

They were heading to the table when an older woman came from the kitchen arc. Chloe's body froze as her brain linked the dots.

“Chloe, there’s someone here you still haven’t met,” Kurt said, and Chloe searched for Aubrey’s hand by reflex. “This is Violet Wyatt, my mom. Your grandmother.”

She shook Mrs. Wyatt hand as she approached them. She was a woman around seventy with grey hair and a serious face. There was barely a hint of a smile when she greeted Chloe then Aubrey. The look in her eyes could only be read in one way: indifference.

That was the only look Chloe always imagined her to have, from the awful stories her mom told her - that, to this day, Chloe couldn't know until what point were real and not just a manifestation of her illness - so that wasn’t shocking or surprising to her. It almost felt right; if she had received her in any other way, that would shatter all the expectations Chloe forgot she had about that woman.

Chloe watched as Aubrey greeted the grey-haired lady with nothing but politeness before Kurt told them he was going to show them to their room before dinner. Chloe couldn’t express how thankful she was when Aubrey looped an arm around her shoulders as they followed her father.

There wasn’t a room reserved for them. Kurt was kind enough to accommodate them in the guest house in their backyard. It was a stylish cabin just as charming as the main house with a rocky short path linking the two constructions. It followed the wooden pattern and it was as perfectly furnished. They had a small living room slash kitchenette, with a fireplace and a couch that looked not only comfortable but also expensive on the main floor. Upstairs in the mezzanine, they had the bedroom with a double bed, an adjacent bathroom and a window wall with a beautiful view of the woods. They had privacy, they had comfort. Chloe instantly noticed that Aubrey was amazed by the house.

As they made their way back into the dining room and took their places at the table, Chloe noticed the look Grandmother Wyatt was giving them. She sighed and tried to ignore it even if it felt like a dozen of nails being nagged into her head. She thinks Aubrey noticed her discomfort because she rested her hand against hers over the table. Chloe pulled back, cursing herself for the hurt look she saw in Aubrey’s face.

Even before their fake dating agreement, holding hands was their thing. It was their way to say things when words failed or made themselves unnecessary. Chloe felt like she had attacked that sacred, untouched, tradition.

Chloe laid her hand against Aubrey’s tight under the table, chastely, and the blonde quickly met it with her own. The squeeze she received was a signal that Aubrey understood - she always did.

As they all dined, Kurt and Angela were fast trying to make the atmosphere more familiar and less “my daughter from a previous relationship and her girlfriend that I’m trying to make amends with are spending Christmas with us”. Angela asked them about school and work; it was very generic but it was enough to make Aubrey take the lead in the conversation - an uniquely turn, because Chloe was the extroverted, the charmer, the people person, but that night the roles were inverted.

Aubrey told them about how she was in law school, following her father’s footsteps. She went on talking about living in New York and how busy and expensive it was, but she knew that the education she was receiving in Columbia was worth it, just like the opportunities that existed in the city for Chloe’s career.

She made paragraphs in the air with compliments about Chloe’s writing and creativity, citing her triumphs and seeming to forget about her failures. She told them about how Stephen Soundheim asked Chloe – when she was one of his friend’s assistant – for one of her scripts but failed to mention about how he probably never read it. Aubrey was determined to not give anyone a chance to doubt Chloe’s talent.

Chloe stepped in and asked the kids about their interests and while the twins answered with the awkwardness expected from teenage boys speaking in front of their parents, Luke was outgoing and spoke volumes like Chloe does in normal situations. Aubrey tried to get Wendy to talk too, but the kid looked like a scared fawn. This made Chloe laugh and almost forget that Mrs. Wyatt still hadn’t tried to be a part of the conversation.

She was so grateful that Aubrey managed to hold her hand as much as possible during the stolen breaks between eating and chatting, because the blonde was the only real thing to her in that table. Kurt, Angela, the kids and their grandmother were part of a world she didn’t belong to. She had been in that situation before but for short dinners when they are in New York or to a short stay – never with Mrs. Wyatt, though.

Suddenly, she was nervous about their stay. But Aubrey absently traced her knuckles with her thumb and she felt like crying for more than one reason. Love, relief, despair, comfort. She leaned in and kissed Aubrey cheek, another silent thank you that the blonde would never know what exactly was for. She cursed herself instantly for acting by her impulse when Mrs. Wyatt turned her look away from them.

The move unwantedly raised awareness for them. Not to Chloe or Aubrey, but for them, as a couple. As an item. As two people that were supposedly in love.

“How long have you guys been dating?” Angela asked in a way that made clear that she had been eager to start that conversation.

They looked at each other, relieved that they practiced their fake story.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** : _be quiet I’m exercising my writing_
> 
> 12-19-2019 9:04PM

* * *

“We are dating for two years,” Chloe said on the night they were building their narrative.

It was a quiet night, they were sitting by the tiny living room back in New York, Chloe with a script on her lap as always and Aubrey reading for fun, since she was done with law school for the year.

“Then why wouldn’t you have mentioned me before? Or why haven’t I gone to dinner with them the last time they were here?” Aubrey tested the affirmation.

“You’re right. It has to be a span of time shorter than their last visit.” Chloe hummed in thought. “Eight months is alright.”

“Recapitulating: we met in the Bellas, we share a place since we moved to NY after college, and we started dating eight months ago,” Aubrey said.

“Well, this will be easy. Only the last part is a lie,” Chloe beamed.

“And all the kissing. And the part we are in love,” Aubrey replied, turning her attention back to her Kindle.

Chloe just dismissed her with a wave of hand, wanting to argue on that but giving up. “We’ll rock this.”

* * *

“Oh, so this is pretty solid?” Kurt asked, in an excited tone.

Aubrey looked at Chloe and the redhead found herself wanting to believe in that dreamy look the blonde was giving her without knowing why. Maybe because she was a needy son of a bitch, maybe because she wanted to spite her grandmother. Maybe both.

“Very solid. There’s no way to fall out of love with this girl,” Aubrey said to Kurt, even though she didn’t take her eyes off Chloe.

Chloe wanted to laugh and kiss her at the same time. Again, not sure why.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** : _thinking about taking some acting classes_
> 
> 22th, 8:12 PM

* * *

They helped Sawyer cleaning up after dinner while the adults insisted for them to lounge in the living room with a bottle of wine. Chloe excused themselves saying they had enough wine over diner and passed the invite to the next day, allegedly tired from the trip. Aubrey followed the redhead to the kitchen even if Chloe refusing alcohol was very unlikely.

Sawyer chatted with Chloe about some baseball thing Aubrey didn’t understand while she cleaned the counters and he separated the garbage, with Taylor sitting by the kitchen island paying attention to the conversation and Luke sat by his side with a sketchbook. Aubrey tried to make small talk with the younger boy as she put the dishes into the dishwasher.

He was talented and that’s was statement. She was halfway telling him about how he could make a career out of it, something that her father would strongly advise against – and probably his too, given his hesitation towards Chloe’s career - when they noticed a little head peaking out from behind the wall that separated the dining room area from the kitchen.

“She is shy,” Taylor told Aubrey. “Don’t mind her.”

Aubrey stepped into the arc to look at Wendy again. “Well, she is also fast. Or invisible. I have no idea where the kid is.” She said, even though she could see small socked feet at the bottom of the curtains.

Chloe walked to her with an amused smile and peeked her head out of the arc too. “You’re right. She must have a superpower or something.”

They heard giggles and looked at each other, Aubrey resting her back against the wall behind her. They heard giggles again but coming from the kitchen this time. Luke was the owner, but the twins has smirks on their faces. The younger boy raised one eyebrow.

“What is it?” Chloe asked them and followed their looks to above the girls’ head.

There was a mistletoe hanging on the arc and Chloe rolled her eyes.

(In order to not look awkward and clumsy when they eventually had to kiss in front of the Wyatts, they practiced kissing.

They were sitting with their legs crossed in front of each other on Aubrey’s bed the night before they left for the trip and practiced. There was a lot of laughing, - from both parts - devilishly licking mouths and cheeks - from Chloe’s part - and some “if you don’t stop with this now, you better find another fake girlfriend” - from Aubrey’s part. They got it right eventually - and it was easy, simple, almost perfect. Chloe rested her hands against Aubrey’s knees and leaned in, not laughing, not aiming to lick her nose this time, just touching their lips together and kissing her softly and languidly. After a few tries, they got the handle of it. Hands found their way through necks and waists ever so naturally, like they had been doing that for years. Both hoped the other hadn’t noticed their blushed cheeks under the low light of the bedroom.)

They were prepared, they just didn’t expect to need the new acquired ability so soon. Not kissing under the mistletoe would be a red flag for their fake romance. What kind of lovebirds would run from that opportunity?

Choe looked up at Aubrey and her eyes were asking permission - the fool had no idea Aubrey had conceded long ago. She brought Aubrey’s head down, holding it by the chin, delicately, and leaned in, kissing Aubrey’s lips softly.

Aubrey raised a hesitant hand to rest against the side of Chloe’s neck, but the moment was gone too soon when they heard someone cleaning their throat.

She looked at the side and Mrs. Wyatt was entering the kitchen with an empty glass of wine and a judgmental look on her face.

Chloe sighed as the woman passed them and the kids dispersed themselves murmuring good nights. She looked up at Aubrey and the blonde sighed too, certain that she was red as a tomato.

“We did nothing wrong,” Chloe said low enough to Mrs. Wyatt not hear.

And Aubrey wasn’t sure if her friend said that to ease her or herself.

* * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _Great view. – in Maine. [view image]_
> 
> 12-22-2019 9:44 PM

* * *

“This is breathtaking,” Aubrey said, when they went back to the cabin.

Before her was the sight of the forest through the window. Snow was falling unhurriedly on the pine trees, so slowly that it seemed that the world was moving too fast.

Chloe was sitting by the bed and murmured an unexcited agreement, which claimed Aubrey’s attention. She saw the blonde turning away from the window to find her.

“Hey.” Aubrey walked to her and knelt in front of her. “Is everything okay?”

The redhead looked past Aubrey’s head for a few seconds, as if trying to unravel the mysteries that the white forest kept for itself. Then she looked at her lap, still avoiding Aubrey’s eyes.

“I didn’t know she would be here,” she said, in a low voice afraid the walls would hear her.

“Your grandmother?” Aubrey asked, running her hands softly against Chloe’s tight over her jeans.

“His mother,” Chloe said rapidly. “Did you see the way she looked at me? The way she looked at us?”

“Yes,” Aubrey answered. “But we can’t let ourselves be bothered by that. You can’t let yourself be bothered by that. She doesn’t know you. She has no idea how wonderful you are.” She cupped Chloe’s face with one hand.

The redhead raised her hand to hold Aubrey’s hand against her cheek. Her friend was right, of course. But she also knew Mrs. Wyatt condemnation was beyond herself, beyond Aubrey, beyond them. She decided to let this explanation for another hour, when they weren’t so tired and when she wasn’t too hurried to sleep next to Aubrey.

“Thank you,” she said softly, now looking deep into Aubrey’s eyes and rubbing her thumb against her cheek. “For being here. I couldn’t do it without you. I wouldn’t want to.”

Aubrey nodded, and Chloe thought she was going to kiss her lips again, but all she did was kiss her forehead and smile down at her before going to the bathroom.

* * *

Chloe woke up first in their first morning there. She waited for Aubrey to wake up, curled up against her side, her head resting against her chest, letting herself be soothed by the blonde’s steady heartbeat.

Sharing a bed wasn’t one of the things they had to practice, they did it all the time. Chloe blamed herself and her lack of sense of personal space, but Aubrey didn’t seem to mind at all. It all started when they first became friends and she began to drag Aubrey from one frat party to another. In the end of the night, they would crash in one of their dorms, on the same bed. Sometimes drunk, sometimes sober enough to not have excuses to cuddle against each other. Eventually it became part of who they were as friends and they stopped looking for excuse to not be like that.

She felt Aubrey moving underneath her and snapped her head up, to watch the blonde opening her eyes.

“I can’t believe you are already awake,” Aubrey said, her voice raspy with sleepiness. “This never happened before.”

Chloe blinked and rested her forehead against Aubrey’s chin. “I couldn’t sleep very well.”

“Do you want me to take the couch tonight? I really don’t mind,” the blonde offered.

“No, no,” the redhead said hastily raising her head to face Aubrey. “It’s not that. Stay, you’re an amazing pillow.” She laughed when Aubrey rolled her eyes. She rearranged her body, laying on her belly, half on the bed, half on top of the blonde. “My mind just is a mess right now.”

Aubrey tucked Chloe’s hair behind her ear. In that moment, in the middle of that cozy warm bedroom, Chloe thought if this was new to Aubrey. If she was just like this dating boys, or if she was being an entirely new significant other just for her. Does she also touches them that lightly, with so much care? Is she also the one that holds them when they sleep?

Because even if they are physically close as friends, she can’t help but notice that there’s something different about the way Aubrey is handling her. It’s like she believes in what she doing, like there’s nothing but the truth between them and the world. But of course she shouldn’t expect less than full commitment from Aubrey.

She liked being Aubrey’s girlfriend. It was the easiest thing she had ever done; it was like singing and hitting all the right notes. But she wouldn’t say that and make herself look like a fool when the holiday was over and Aubrey would go back to being the trophy wife every guy from law school dreamed of.

“Why don’t we take a walk after breakfast?” Aubrey suggested, and Chloe couldn’t think of a better idea to clear her mind.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** : _aubrey: we should get breakfast_
> 
> _me: this is literally the most intelligent woman to ever exist her mind is gigantic I love her with all my heart I would be dead without her I-_
> 
> 12-23-2019 6:52AM
> 
> * * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _Walking is an exercise for the body and the soul._
> 
> 12-23-2019 8:01AM

* * *

After a quick breakfast, they left the house walking hand in hand because Angela was watching them from the porch after she pointed them the better path to take a peaceful walk, but even after they knew they were out of her vision, they didn’t let go of each other hands.

It was still very early in the morning and they hadn’t seen Kurt or Mr. Wyatt yet because they left to downtown earlier, neither the kids because they were still sleeping.

Aubrey was never allowed to sleep in as a child, not even during school breaks. Mr. Posen always managed to find something for her and her brothers to do: cleaning, reading, running. Anything that kept them useful, wasting time was not allowed. It is possible that the first time Aubrey ever slept past eight in the morning was on the Saturday after the first college party Chloe dragged her into. She could still remember stretching her arm over Chloe’s body to pick up her phone and realizing it was nearly noon.

There was a layer of snow covering the ground, being marked by their footsteps as they distanced themselves from the house. Cold air was biting exposed cheeks, noses, ears. Aubrey thanked God she had brought the warmest scarf she had - an old thing, knitted by one of the many nannies she had as a child.

They walked chatting about the weather, work, school, grocery shopping, Beca, plans for New Year’s Day. They talked about anything but the house they just left. Aubrey knew she couldn’t enter the matter, she had to wait for Chloe to come around.

It was their silent agreement. They knew how to wait for each other. Sometimes it was a few hours, days. Sometimes it was weeks, even months. The important part was that they would seek out for the other but respect their own times first. Aubrey is pretty sure Chloe was the one that started this because when they met, it took Aubrey huge amounts of effort to let her walls down. So, for those first months, all Chloe did was wait for her.

That day as they contoured the lake, it was one of the scarce times that Aubrey was the one waiting.

At some point, the redhead swiped the layer of snow out of a log that was laid down by the lakeside sat on it, silently. Aubrey noticed how she left a clean space for her; an invite. She sat by her side, arms and shoulders touching.

“Mrs. Wyatt never liked my mom,” Chloe said when Aubrey was already picturing how wonderful that place must be in summer.

The blonde blinked twice shoving her hands in her pockets. The gloves weren’t enough anymore.

“She always thought she was an airheaded bimbo with no future. She couldn’t accept that her only son fell for someone like that,” she paused. “She did everything she could to separate them, even if they were just kids. I mean, what are the chances that you are going to marry your high school sweetheart?”

She paused. Her eyes never left the lake, but Aubrey couldn’t take her eyes from her. There was an intensity in her voice that made clear why those thoughts were troubling her so much.

“She was the one that sent him away,” Chloe told Aubrey.

“When your mother-“

“Got pregnant with me.”

Aubrey adverted her eyes from Chloe. She looked at her own boots and then to the river. “I didn’t know.”

She knew that Chloe was an unexpected baby, that her mother got pregnant with her in high school, raised her on her own and that it was far from easy. She always thought her father had left because that’s what stupid boys do when they face hard situations, not because he was forced to.

And she knew Chloe's mom was not the easiest person to deal with. Her later diagnosis of bipolar disorder explained it, but it came too close to her death. Chloe didn't talk a lot about it, Aubrey knew it was still a fresh wound.

“He told my mom when he left her. That his mom was sending him off to Canada so his life wouldn’t be ruined,” she said with a scoff, her eyes not leaving the water.

Aubrey followed her gaze.

“Do you remember Walt?” Chloe asked Aubrey.

Once, Chloe cried desperately as she saw a cat abandoned in the street behind their building. The furry thing was fat, spoiled and well taken care of. With him, there was a paper box with cat stuff: a small bed, a bag of cat food, a few toys and a bowl. He was left behind. Chloe named him Walt and moved mountains to find him a new home.

Aubrey nodded. He lived now with an old Bella counterpart of them and she always posted pictures of him on Instagram. Chloe probably didn’t know that Aubrey would hit the like button as soon as she saw his chubby face in a picture.

“That’s what happened to mom,” Chloe concluded. “Someone wanted we-“ She looked down. “Someone wanted her once. And for some reason they stopped wanting her.”

Aubrey knew Chloe was talking about her too, and that broke her heart in more than one way. She looped an arm around Chloe, bringing her closer.

Chloe rested her head against her shoulder. “I keep telling myself that it’s in the past and that I must forgive them but it’s so hard, Bree.” She paused. “I don’t think I want to.”

Aubrey turned her head and rested her chin against the top of Chloe’s head. She wished she knew what to say to Chloe, she wished that she could arrange a string of paragraphs like she does for her classes and tell her all the right things.

One of the reasons Aubrey went there was because she hoped Chloe would improve her relationship with her father. Aubrey herself couldn’t imagine a world in which her father wasn’t there for her, and she hoped so much that Chloe could, one day, have that feeling of unconditional love and support. Of course, her own father wasn’t perfect - he was far from it, actually – but Aubrey loved and respected him.

“You don’t have to forgive anyone,” she told Chloe, after some thought.

“But I should try to,” Chloe said raising her head and looking at her friend.

“Maybe,” Aubrey said. She squeezed her knee.

Chloe sighed and looked at the horizon again.

Aubrey watched as a shiver ran through her body before she spoke again.

“Tell me what to do.”

Aubrey chuckled slightly. Years ago, she would do it without thinking twice. “I can’t.”

“But you’ll support me in whatever I decide, right?”

Aubrey smiled. “There’s no other way for me.”

* * *

**@thechloebeeale** : _come in just don’t mind the mess it’s just emotional trauma from my childhood_

12-23-2019 9:27AM

* * *

When they came back to the house, snow is falling again. Kurt’s car was parked outside and Chloe sighed. She was hoping she wouldn’t have to deal with that for a couple more hours at least.

Kurt greeted them cheerfully as they entered the house. Mrs. Wyatt was in the kitchen with Angela and they are stocking the grocery shop that was on top of the kitchen island. The kids were having breakfast and greeted them with short waves – except Wendy, that slips from her chair to under the table. This makes Aubrey laugh and Chloe finds herself turning to watch her just because it’s beautiful.

“Girls, come with me,” Kurt tells them excited and leads the way until the guest house.

A bare pine tree is standing in a corner of the living room, dripping melted snow into the carpet. Chloe notices Aubrey raising a brow at the pooling water under it.

“I thought it would be nice for you guys to have some Christmas spirit in here,” he said motioning to his surrounds.

“That is so sweet,” Aubrey tells him. “Thank you.”

Kurt nods with a proud smile. “We have Christmas decoration in the attic that you can use. You can ask the kids to help you set everything up here. Luke is crazy about this stuff, he won’t mind.”

Chloe watched as Aubrey thanked him again and told him they’ll make that place look like Santa’s house. She could only wonder what would be of her if Aubrey wasn’t there to be her voice. She noticed that Aubrey found a rag somewhere and started to mop the floor around the tree.

“That’s the spirit,” Kurt laughs and turns to Chloe with a cautious expression. “Chloe, can I have a word with you?”

She looked for Aubrey to save her from that, but the blonde was busy in her task. She nodded and followed him to the porch where could still see Aubrey through the sliding glass door, tidying up the tree as she could. That kept her mind at ease for a few seconds before her father started talking.

“I want to apologize for your grandmother’s behavior last night,” Kurt said with a genuine sorry look in eyes. “You have to know that you are welcome in this house and so is the person you love.”

Chloe nodded without looking into his eyes.

She thought about letting it go. She could forgive them in silence, little by little. Never address what she had in mind, never say a word. But as she looked at Aubrey through the glass again, cleaning the tree with the rag, she realized she wasn’t going to add one more issue into the list of the things she wasn’t saying out loud.

“I think Mrs. Wyatt’s problem is beyond me or my girlfriend,” she said.

Kurt nodded without looking into her eyes. “I’m sorry about that. She is difficult, Chloe. She- I’m just really sorry. I’ll talk to her.”

Chloe couldn’t handle one more round of his excuses. “I’ll help Bree,” she said, going back into the cabin.

“Chloe,” he called and she turned before entering the sliding glass door. “I just want you to know I’m glad you’re here.”

She nodded, unsure of what to say and sorry she had a hard time believing in it.

* * *

**@aubreyrposen** : _She is in music paradise. @thechloebeeale [view picture]_

12-23-2019 10:39AM

* * *

Taylor helped them into the attic of the main house but left them alone to look for the Christmas decorations, with the lack of interest only teenage boys executing orders from their parents can show.

If Aubrey could be honest, she was expecting a place dustier and messier, but organized plastic boxes were pilled and tagged and there were several shelves for the clutter.

“These are amazing,” Chloe says, pulling out a copy of a Fleetwood Mac album from a shelf.

“I don’t think we should be snooping around in other people’s stuff,” Aubrey said, but walked to Chloe’s side and held the LP.

Chloe fished out of another nearby box copies of Parallel Lines, Sign O The Times, Paul’s Boutique, She’s So Unusual, Let’s Dance and Slippery When Wet. Aubrey rolls her eyes when Chloe passes her The Bangles’ Everything album.

“This is a very diverse collection, I’ll give you that,” Aubrey commented as she held it in one hand and The Joshua Tree in the other.

She wanted to stop the wander through the collection and look for Christmas decoration but Chloe looked happier than any moment after they got to her father’s house. She looked almost like the Chloe that makes her watch cat videos on YouTube as they have breakfast on Sunday morning. Or the Chloe that surprises her on the way out of one of her classes with a bagel and a pair of earphones to share on their way home.

So she allowed Chloe to get lost in it. She went through the attic looking for the decoration and listening to Chloe telling her about songs she doesn’t know and songs they should listen more often to. She found a paper box stuffed with tree ornaments and tangled Christmas lights and only then noticed that Chloe had gone silent.

“Chloe?” She called.

Chloe was sitting by the floor, staring intensely at an album sleeve.

Aubrey walked to her and looked over her shoulder. It’s an old The Beach Boys album, one of those people usually forget about, overshadowed by The Pet Sounds. Soon she noticed what caught her friend’s attention.

Beside the column of the track list, was written in a loopy calligraphy:

_Dearest Kurt,_

_I would miss you every single day until the day I die, but I won’t because I know you will find your way back to me and to our child._

_Our song is in this album. I hope you can listen to it and remember somewhere there’s a girl who loves you very much._

_Only yours,_

_Patty._

Chloe ran her fingers over the old handwritten note repeatedly until Aubrey got worried that the friction would erase it. But it was a permanent marker, it was there to stay.

The blonde read through the name of the songs, noticing that one of them was underlined with the same ink from the note. That was it. Patty and Kurt’s song. It was a lovely song and she found herself smiling at the thought of a romance wrapped in those lyrics and melody.

“I wish we could listen to it,” Chloe said in a whisper, still looking at the case, unreadable expression on her usually so open face.

Aubrey looked around searching for a LP player but didn’t find one, what explained why the discs were clearly unused for God knows how long. She got up and searched in the highest shelves while the redhead remained sitting by the ground, holding the LP case in her hands, surrounded by piles of other albums.

Through the small window you could see the grey skies and the top of the trees that surrounded the house. The light entering the room was grey and cold. She couldn’t allow that moment to bring back the frown to Chloe’s face.

Aubrey had an idea.

As the sound left Aubrey’s phone speakers, Chloe turned her head in the blonde’s direction as if noticing only then that her friend was still there with her. A small smile started appearing on her face and Aubrey felt her chest fill with pride and love at the same time.

_Well it's been building up inside of me_

_For oh I don't know how long_

Chloe looked into her eyes and Aubrey allowed the fondest smile she could manage to take over her face. She rested her phone on one of the shelves and extended her hand for Chloe to take.

_I don't know why_

_But I keep thinking_

_Something's bound to go wrong_

Chloe took her hand and Aubrey pulled her up to her feet, bringing her closer. She made the slightest move, telling Chloe with her body that they were dancing, that she should follow her, trust her, hold her. And Chloe did.

_But she looks in my eyes_

_And makes me realize_

_And she says "don't worry, baby"_

Aubrey held her friend tight, wanting to bring Chloe inside her, protect her from whatever demons she found in that attic, from her own thoughts. She kept swaying them, side to side, in that terrible way old people dance.

_Don't worry, baby_

_Don't worry, baby_

_Everything will turn out alright_

She was feeling quite comfortable and playful when she swirled Chloe over her head and made her laugh before bringing her back into her, wrapping one arm around her waist and holding out her hand with her own free hand.

_Don't worry, baby_

_Don't worry, baby_

_Don't worry, baby_

Chloe giggled and so did she. The redhead only followed the taller woman’s body, side to side. Chloe’s sweater against Aubrey’s made a soft sound of friction as they moved that was an evidence of how close they were. She threw her free arm back around Aubrey's shoulders and rested their foreheads together, swaying with the rhythm of the song.

_She makes me come alive_

_And makes me wanna drive_

_When she says "don't worry, baby"_

_Don't worry, baby_

_Don't worry, baby_

_Everything will turn out alright_

Aubrey opened her eyes and raised her head to kiss Chloe’s forehead, then her temple and felt lighter when Chloe rested her chin against her shoulder.

She could tell she was being a little more affectionate than the usual with Chloe, and shook the thought aside with the excuse that Chloe needed her to be close and supportive in that moment.

_She told me "Baby, when you race today_

_Just take along my love with you_

_And if you knew how much I loved you_

_Baby, nothing could go wrong with you_

“Did you find it?” Luke asked, appearing from the entrance. “The Christmas stuff?”

They looked around them, still holding each other close and stopping swaying around. The song was still finishing on the background. 

“I see, the discs are a distraction.” He made a face. “I’ve been there.” He found the paper box with his gaze, unaware or unbothered of the moment he just interrupted. “Shall we decorate your tree?"

* * *

**@thechloebeeale** _: just decorated this tree with bree and had a fight over who got to put the star on the top so what (I won)_

12-23-2019 11:59AM

* * *

Luke helped them set the decoration on the cabin. They put ornaments and Christmas lights on the tree and more Christmas lights over the furniture just because they could. Aubrey, the taller one between them, hang a few mistletoes around and Luke got a kiss on the cheek from Chloe for standing under one of them.

Aubrey left them on their own, telling them she was going to check if someone needed help in the main house, sure Chloe was distracted and would be alright without her. As a good Posen, she didn’t feel good just walking around without doing any chores. As her father always said, “if you're not in a hotel, you should find a way to show your hosts you are grateful".

She found Angela alone by the kitchen.

“Do you need help?”

“Aubrey! Aren’t you sweet?” She was wearing scrubs and taking things out of the refrigerator. “Thanks, but I’m just going to heat some leftover for lunch.”

Aubrey ignored her and went on helping her with the task anyway. “Are you going to the hospital?”

“Yes, last shift before Christmas,” she told, closing the refrigerator’s door. “I’ll just put some bones back in place and head home to cook our turkey.” She winked.

Aubrey always thought having a successful career and having a big family weren’t things that went well together, at least not for a woman. Men were always allowed to rely on their wives to raise as much children as they wish – see: her father and his five children. Women couldn’t do the same. As Aubrey started her legal career, she was convinced she would never have a family as big as her parents had.

As she scanned the family pictures hanging on the walls, she began to change her mind.

“You’ve got a beautiful family,” Aubrey told Angela.

“Thank you. It’s a lot of work to keep everyone fed and clean and sometimes I can’t wait for them to go to college, but it’s great,” Angela said with a laugh. “You’ll know what I mean when you have kids of you own. Or don’t have them. It’s always an option.”

Aubrey laughed. “Yes, but not with Chloe. She wants a crew,” she said mindlessly, remembering their usual conversations about the matter.

“Well, you guys are lucky that you can alternate the pregnancies,” Angela commented.

“We think about adoption, mainly,” Aubrey said even though they didn’t, because friends usually don’t make those kinds of decision together. But she entertained herself with the idea of being Chloe’s real future wife.

She knew exactly what Chloe wanted, she knew more than any of the people Chloe ever dated. She knew she hated public proposals and destination weddings. She knew the names Chloe thought to be cute for boys and the ones she was against because made them sound like bullies. She knew the lullabies she was going to sing to her children because she sometimes sang it to Aubrey when she was sick. She knew Chloe and what she wanted for her future so well and she was suddenly proud of it.

“Though Chloe wants the experience of a pregnancy, I know,” she added.

“Wait, am I going to be a granddad?” Kurt appeared by the kitchen with a smile.

“God, no,” Aubrey blushed. “Not for a while.”

He looked eager in some way. His hands resting on his waist and a shy smile was on his face. He leaned on his elbows over the counter Aubrey was cleaning.

Then, after a while pretending he was doing nothing but wait for lunch, he spoke. “So, Aubrey, how are things in New York? I mean-"

“Kurt!” Angela called out.

“I just wanna help,” he said to his wife. “Is everything okay financially? I’m sorry to ask you that but Chloe never tells us anything and we want to help.”

Aubrey felt like just standing there without Chloe was a betrayal. If she said anything, she wouldn’t be able to live with herself.

They were a law student and a personal assistant for a Broadway producer living in a tiny shoebox on Queens. Their apartment technically only had one bedroom, Aubrey’s, and they made up another one in their living room with some old bookshelves and Pinterest’s help. It’s not like they were having money issues, but they were far from comfortable. They lived, they learned, Chloe wrote, Aubrey read thick law books by the coffee table, they tried new recipes, and attended a Broadway musical in the worst possible seats to celebrate birthdays. They just had to wait one more year, until Aubrey graduated and Chloe got someone important to watch one of her productions and they would find a better place, with a second bedroom and a balcony, maybe.

“We're good,” Aubrey said, and didn’t really lie.

“Really?” Kurt asked, not believing in her.

“Dear, stop bugging them,” Angela said. “They take care of each other.”

Aubrey smiled to her.

“I’m sorry bothering you with that, Aubrey. I just worry about her. She never let’s me in, I never know what is going on. And this whole writer thing I-”

She wanted to tell him, a regretful father, that that’s just how Chloe was, that sometimes she would be mysterious and quiet and simply not talk. Except that was not Chloe; that was the effect he had on her.

“You don’t have to worry. She is talented, hardworking, smart. She is extremely resilient.” _If you knew her a little better, you’d know that_ , she wanted to add. “She is not far from her big break, believe me. I tell her that every day.”

He eyed her with interest mixed with curiosity. He seemed about to ask Aubrey about it, to learn a little more about Chloe through her, since she wouldn’t give him the chance herself.

“Kurt, can you tell the kids and your mom that lunch is served?” Angela asked, approaching them.

Kurt nodded hesitantly and left the kitchen.

“I know she may find it suffocating. He is struggling to find his ground as a father to her,” Angela told Aubrey in a low voice. “He can care a little too much sometimes.”

Aubrey raised her eyebrows. “Chloe is just the same.”

Angela smiled softly. “We are so glad to know she has you with her,” she said, cupping Aubrey’s face.

She nodded with an uneasy feeling. She wished Chloe knew she had her, too.

* * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _Chloe build a blanket fort in our living room. She is 25._
> 
> 12-23-2019, 12:21 AM

* * *

“Luke helped me build. Isn’t it cute?” Chloe told Aubrey as she entered the cabin with their lunch.

Aubrey eyed the blankets and pillows arranged over the living room. She could bet her Bella scarf that the idea came from Chloe. “It’s-,” she started but gave up on her comment about the structure. “I brought lunch. Angela suggested it since everyone is scattered around. Where’s Luke?”

“The twins promised to take him to play on the snow,” Chloe said, getting out of the fort and joining Aubrey in the kitchen. “So of course he ditched me.”

Aubrey picked up two plates from the cupboard and out on the table so they could eat together. She went back to the table thinking about how much better equipped that guest house was than their home in New York.

“Quick question: what kind of job exactly you need to have to buy a house like this?” She asked, sitting in front of Chloe and secretly wondering also about Kurt's incessant tries to help Chloe financially. 

“He owns a company that builds homes. Apparently, people needs homes so it’s a good business,” Chloe said putting food on her plate. “Who could tell, huh? Oh, and Angela is a doctor, so they’re pretty stable. They got everything you need to be happy, all the steps. The home, the job, the person, the children. Everything I feel like I’ll never have.”

Chloe then proceeded to tell Aubrey that Beca texted her telling that she was heading to the airport and should be at her dad's by the end of the evening, clearly a strategy to skip the matter. She suggested watching a Christmas movie later after dinner in their fort.

“Not my fort," Aubrey said. "I think we should socialize after dinner."

The redhead stopped eating. “Socialize?”

“Yeah,” Aubrey said, slowly. “Hang with Kurt and Angela for a while.”

Chloe looked at her. “And my grandmother.”

Aubrey moved the food around her plate with the fork. “Yes, I suppose.”

They were silent for a while.

“I think it will be nice to-"

Chloe seemed to think for a moment. "No.”

Aubrey rested her fork on the plate. “But we are here to show them you’re fine. Show Kurt you are alright. I think it's a good opportunity to do so.”

“He is siding with her, Aubrey.” Chloe raised her voice. “He is siding with her the way she treated my mom. He is excusing her flaws and-"

“That’s not the point. There's no way she could know you mom was ill-"

“Don’t tell me what is the point or not. She treats me like that because she can’t treat my mom like that anymore. If I sit there and let her glare, scoff and roll her eyes at me like I feel like I’m allowing her to scrutinize my mom all over again.” Chloe sighed and looked away. The red spots on her cheeks were red with anger.

“Why don’t you try to talk to her? Explain how you feel and listen-”

“Talk to her? Listen to her? She doesn’t want to talk to me, Aubrey. What the fuck? Why are you siding with them?” She gave her friend a betrayed look.

“I’m not. I'm on your side, always. I want you to be yourself-" Aubrey said, calmly.

“I am being myself. This is me, Aubrey. I’m sorry I am not being your magical bubbly friend because I'm hurting. I have the right to.” She stood up. “You know what, I can’t talk to you right now.” She walked back to the living room and entered the fort, pulling down a blanket that apparently was the door.

That almost made Aubrey laugh if she didn’t feel so bad.

She cleaned the table and washed the dishes, because she is always cleaning things, to keep herself busy, to give Chloe time, to fulfill the silence.

* * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _Does anyone have a good hot chocolate recipe? I don’t trust Google's results._
> 
> 12-23-2019 1:09PM

* * *

“Knock, knock.”

No answer.

“I brought you hot chocolate,” Aubrey said. “I don’t think it’s as good as yours. It tastes weird. Someone gave me the recipe on Twitter.”

No answer. Aubrey sighed.

Chloe was always the first one to apologize. She made it look easy. But Aubrey knew she couldn’t let Chloe come to her this time. She was there for the sole purpose of supporting her, she was the wrong one with no valid excuses.

“I told you this morning I would support you in whatever you needed me to. I had no right to try to push you to do anything,” Aubrey said. She sat outside the fort and put the mug on the floor beside her.

Still no answer came from inside the fort. She fidgeted with the fluffy pink socks she picked from Chloe’s bag. Damn, it was cold.

“Are you asleep?”

“No,” a muffled voice said from inside the fort.

Aubrey kneeled and peeked her head inside, pushing aside the blanket/entrance.

Chloe was curled in a corner on top of a nest made of blankets and pillows, under a thick duvet, her face buried in one of the pillows.

It shattered Aubrey’s heart, just like every time Chloe was sad. She wanted nothing else but to hold her.

Aubrey sighed. Only Chloe could make her go inside that mess. “I’m coming in,” she announced, crawling inside one her hands and knees. She settled beside Chloe’s cocoon, with a safe distance.

“I am sorry,” Aubrey said, after a while.

Chloe raised her head from the pillow. Her eyes were red and her face had marks from the folders of the fabric on it.

Aubrey just wanted to kiss her forehead.

“It’s so weird when you say it,” Chloe said, with a raspy voice, making Aubrey smile. She raised the corner of her duvet up, inviting the blonde in. “Wait, where is the chocolate? Were you lying to me?”

“You can have it outside,” Aubrey said, laying by her side. As soon as she was laying by her side, Chloe buried her face on her shoulder, curling into the shape of her body.

“I’m sorry too,” she said.

Aubrey brought her close and kissed the top of her head. “I felt like I was pushing you. I’m not that person anymore. I'm so sorry.”

Chloe nodded against her. “But I know what you meant,” she said after a while. “I'm not helping anyone hiding and resenting them for what's in the past. Not me, not them.”

The blonde pulled her closer, allowing her to stuck her bare feet between Aubrey socked ones.

“Where should I start?” Chloe asked, raising her head to look at Aubrey.

Aubrey looked down at her and the tip of their noses brushed. “What do you think it’s going to be harder?”

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** _: she got in the fort with me #truelove [view picture]_
> 
> 12-23-2019 2:20PM

* * *

“Good evening, Mrs. Wyatt,” Chloe greeted as chirpily as she could.

Mrs. Wyatt was halfway to taking a sip of her coffee. She took her time and Chloe thought she was going to ignore her completely. She blinked and tried to keep her smile.

“Hello, Chloe,” she greeted back.

Chloe sat beside her by the counter and poured herself some coffee too - even if she hated the taste of it and preferred Aubrey’s terrible hot chocolate she had before - feeling the woman’s eyes on her.

The kitchen was empty if not for the two of them since Angela was still working and Kurt had to run a last minute errand and the kids were doing whatever kids do on winter breaks.

“It’s cold, isn’t it?” Chloe asked the woman.

Mrs. Wyatt raised a brow and, much to Chloe’s surprise, she laughed. It was a weird sound; dry, unexpected. It echoed through the empty interior.

“My son asked you to do this, didn’t he?” She asked, not looking in Chloe’s eyes.

Chloe shifted on her seat. “Aubrey did, actually. But I wouldn’t do if I didn’t want to. I noticed you were less than amused to see me, Mrs. Wyatt, and I wanted to know that if my presence offended you somehow.”

She studied Chloe with curious eyes, finally. Openly, not averting her gaze like she did last night.

The redhead felt herself involuntarily straightening her spine, in the way Aubrey does when she is trying to prove to herself that she is not scared. She even lifted her chin a little bit.

“You look a lot like her,” Mrs. Wyatt said, after all. "The eyes, the voice, the smile."

Chloe knew about who she was talking about. “I’m not her.”

“No, you aren’t.”

“Then you can stop treating me as if I am,” Chloe said in a firm voice, suddenly feeling brave.

Mrs. Wyatt seemed to notice the difference in her voice. “Not being her doesn’t mean you act differently from her. Wild girl, she was.”

"She was not wild, she was ill, Mrs. Wyatt." Chloe suddenly remembered why she fought Aubrey against socializing. “What makes you think I’m wild? You don’t know me.”

The older woman sipped her coffee. “It’s a bold choice to come here dating another girl.”

Chloe was prepared for that answer, though. “There’s nothing wild about me and- this is a wrong assumption. Dating a girl doesn’t define my personality.”

“She looks like a good girl, Chloe.” She put her mug down. “Don’t you see you are going to ruin her life with this lifestyle of yours? That’s so alike your mother.”

Chloe stood up, not quite furious, not quite mad. She stared at her grandmother, hands shaking. How dare she say that?

“Don’t talk about my mom. Don’t talk about Aubrey and I,” Chloe said as calmly as she could.

Mrs. Wyatt sighed loudly.

“Why are you talking to me, kid?” She asked, seeming particularly neutral.

Chloe looked around them. “I want you to give me a chance, I guess. The chance to be a blank page,” she gulped down, trying not to cry.

The older woman nodded briefly. “Alright.”

Chloe frowned. “That’s it?”

“Kurt asked me the same thing,” she said, not looking into Chloe’s eyes. “I’ll try. We'll try. Let's give ourselves time.”

The redhead nodded, confused. “Okay.” She walked away but turned back before she left the room. “I would never ruin Aubrey,” she said. “I’d never do her wrong.” She paused. “That’s the first thing you should know about me.”

Mrs. Wyatt seemed amused. "That's good."

Then Chloe left. Feeling brave and confused at the same time.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** _: bree is so competitive id pay to watch her do the entire olympics on her own_
> 
> 12-23-2019 3:04 PM

* * *

She made her way back to the cabin to tell her friend about that weird and unlikely easy encounter but the place was empty and Aubrey’s coat was gone. She grabbed her own and left the cabin. Maybe Aubrey went out for a walk and she could still catch her.

Contouring the house and heading to the front of the main house, she saw Taylor hiding behind Aubrey’s car and instantly knew what was going on. A flying snowball that hit the left back tire only confirmed her statement. There was a snowball fight going on, and much to her surprise, Aubrey was being a part of it.

She smiled with the scene. The blonde ran appeared from behind a close tree with her two hands full of snow and threw in Taylor’s direction, one missing him for inches and the other hitting him right on his shoulder.

“Ouch!” Taylor yelled, and Sawyer laughed from his hiding spot on the other side of the porch.

Chloe watched as Luke jumped out of the other side of Aubrey’s car and attacked Sawyer with two snowballs. Apparently, they were working in teams and Luke was revenging his teammate.

“We’re still winning. You are looking like a damn snowman,” Sawyer yelled as he shook his head, snow dripping from his hair.

“You have one more, it’s not fair,” Luke yelled back. He threw another ball at his brother, but it hit a garden lantern nearby.

“Don’t be a cry baby, it’s Wendy,” Sawyer laughed and hit Luke with a snowball right on his face, that he quickly wiped out before running to find another hiding place.

Chloe looked around to find the younger Wyatt and her heart almost melted when she found the little girl hiding behind Aubrey’s legs. She watched as the blonde pulled her back into their hiding spot behind a massive tree and walked a little bit to keep an eye on them.

The blonde crunched up and helped Wendy roll a ball on her gloved hands, before instructing her on how to throw it. The little girl obeyed but her ball barely flew a meter. She watched as Aubrey gave her an encouragement to try again and smiled when the blonde pulled the kid into her, avoiding that she was hit by one of Taylor’s flying snowballs.

“I’m in,” Chloe yelled from the porch.

“Here, Chloe. You’re with us,” Luke yelled from behind Aubrey’s car. “Now it’s fair.”

Aubrey’s head peaked from behind the tree and she gave Chloe a smirk that she gave back to the blonde.

Chloe soon got the rhythm; she did got hit several times, but as she found a nice hiding spot, she end up hitting Sawyer and Aubrey back and being able to avoid their attacks easily. As she found the perfect way to attack the blonde, the snowball ended up hitting Wendy, whom lost her equilibrium and fell on her butt. She was worried for two seconds, afraid that she had hurt the little girl, but Wendy just giggled as Aubrey helped her up.

The little girl laughed hysterically as Aubrey gave her a huge snowball, carried her up and ran with her in Chloe’s direction. Chloe grinned at the silliness of the action and allowed the little girl to shove the amount of snow into her hair.

“Avenged?” Aubrey asked the little girl and she nodded. “Good. I’ll take you back to the porch, so I can destroy all of them, alright?” She threw Wendy over her shoulder and said as promised. “Now it’s war, boys.”

And she was serious about it. One of the things that Chloe loved about Aubrey was how determined she was. This always led to an obsession or an extreme competition, which were two things that she could hate about Aubrey. But in that moment it was just adorable seeing the blonde letting go from her stoic and serious posture and just playing in the snow like a child. She didn’t let Luke, Taylor or Chloe win without a fight. She and Sawyer were a quick team and even in disadvantage were a huge resistance. They ended up losing, soaked from snow and panting.

“Alright, we lost. Pretend that I’m waving a white flag here,” Sawyer said as he dropped on the ground and his brothers ran to pile on top of him.

Chloe laughed. She felt tired and energetic at the same time. It was like she was a child again and it felt good to just enjoy this game for a while.

She was wiping snow out of her shoulders when Aubrey approached her, and she started to think about how she wished she had grown up with her; she wished to share with Aubrey all her childhood secret spots, adventures and discoveries. How pure would it be to see Aubrey become the person she was, such an honor would it feel to be a part of that process. The blonde smiled down at her and if she was in her right mind, she would notice how mischievous that was, or maybe if she had two seconds more before Aubrey dipped her head down and kissed her fully on her lips and firmly wrapping an arm around her, taking all her breath away.

She didn’t spare a thought about that. Her only response was pull Aubrey closer by her scarf, savoring her cold lips as they became warmer. She couldn’t even think about the nature of that fake kiss, it was so out of nothing that it almost felt real. She allowed herself to think that, to believe she was kissing her girlfriend after a snow ball fight just because. No excuses, no other reason than the fact that they could.

Chloe forgot all her thoughts when she felt the unbearable cold against the back of her head. She heard the boys laughing and Aubrey too as she screamed. She looked for Aubrey and found the blonde a few steps away from her, afraid she would have to face a retaliation. But she looked just so beautiful under the dim light of the end of the afternoon. Chloe couldn’t help; she joined the laugh.

The redhead wiped the snow from her hair and smiled at Aubrey. Genuinely the purest smile she could ever give someone. Aubrey smiled back with a similar smile. And it was unbelievable how it seemed like the sun was rising at that time of the day.

* * *

> **@aubreyrposen** : _I think I made a new friend. [view picture]_
> 
> 12-23-2019 6:03PM

* * *

“No. You can't do it,” Wendy told Aubrey as they looked down at the iPad.

“Why? Shouldn’t I just change the colors?” Aubrey asked, truly confused, what Chloe thought was adorable.

“Yes but if you do it all right I can’t win!” Wendy explained.

Aubrey laughed, throwing her head back. “Alright, I’ll try to underperform.”

“Thanks,” Wendy said on the same beat, making Chloe laugh.

She snapped a picture of the two and headed to the kitchen with her and Aubrey’s glasses to fill with their third glass of wine.

Tonight’s dinner was as close to perfect they would get to. Kurt and Angela were as nice as always and the kids were being less shy, now that Aubrey had conquered their trust that evening.

Even Mrs. Wyatt was being more welcoming, briefing asking the girls if they liked Cole Porter when the matter of Chloe’s career was mentioned. Aubrey was telling them a funny legal story that Chloe had heard a thousand times before when she caught a small laugh coming from her grandmother. It definitely felt like progress.

As Aubrey suggested during lunch, they stayed and socialized after dinner. Even the kids were allowed to pass a little of their bedtimes to lounge around a little bit. Wendy was quick to busy Aubrey with a new game in her iPad and Chloe stood by the side, sharing her attention between talking with the other Wyatts and paying attention to Aubrey playing with her little sister. It made her wonder the kind of mom Aubrey would be one day and the thought made her give the blonde's cheek a kiss when she was sure the attention wasn’t on them.

The kids were saying goodnight as Chloe went back to the living area and gave Aubrey her glass, leaving the adults alone. She sat beside Aubrey since Wendy was gone, and cuddled against her side, glad Aubrey looped an arm around her shoulders, bringing her close.

Kurt told them about the adventures of his business and, asked by Aubrey, shared his inspirations for their house. Angela also shared some medical stories that amazed Chloe and caused Aubrey to scrunch her nose. Mrs. Wyatt still looked stiff as always, but cracked a laugh once in a while and chose to not make faces over the sight of her oldest grandchild huddled with her alleged girlfriend.

It was past midnight and a few bottles of wine gone when the group decided to separate ways. Kurt and Angela and Mrs. Wyatt went upstairs and Aubrey and Chloe stole another bottle of wine before going to the cabin.

“Well, I think they do believe you are alright,” Aubrey said, topping their glasses once again.

“They believe we are getting married too,” Chloe gulped down her glass. “Are you proposing?”

Aubrey sipped her own glass, leaning in the kitchen counter. “Of course. I’m even going to use Grandma’s Posen ring.”

“Oh no, I want to propose,” Chloe faked discontent. “I am the writer, I already have the scene ready in my head.”

Aubrey sighed and smiled in that drunk way Chloe loved. “Alright, I’ll give you that. But I’ll be one waiting for you at the aisle.”

Chloe raised her glass to a toast. “Deal.”

They watched Home Alone and talked the whole movie and then Chloe put on The Carpenter’s Christmas album and convinced Aubrey to dance with her. They were too drunk to move safely, so they ended up just swaying around holding each other.

Chloe stepped closer and hugged Aubrey by the waist, looking her in the eyes. “I feel good. Like, I’m not mad anymore, I’m happy.”

Aubrey smiled down at her, putting her red hair behind her ears and cupping her jaw. “I love that smile.”

The comment made Chloe’s smile larger. “And it’s not just the wine.”

The Christmas lights Luke had found for them to hang on the cabin, a yellow lamp on the small kitchen’s counter and the outside light coming from the main house were the only source of illumination. This made the interior look warm and cozy, as if they were forgotten in a semi dark place in space and time. So where build just for them, in the shadows of the world they usually lived in.

“What else is it?” Aubrey asked, the tips of her fingers finding the back of Chloe’s neck.

“I think I have a family. It feels like it,” Chloe said and eyes were dropping against her will, delighted with Aubrey’s delicate touch. “I feel wanted.”

“You are wanted,” Aubrey whispered.

Chloe opened her eyes to look at her friend.

If Aubrey had had one less glass of wine the words wouldn’t have slipped out of her mouth.

“By you?” Chloe asked, her eyes dancing between Aubrey’s green ones and her lips. “You want me, Bree?”

She knew what she was saying she just didn’t know why.

She loved to push Aubrey’s buttons, to make her roll her eyes in annoyance and lead her to a nonsense bickering session. Those moments were so dear to her, Aubrey would be just her Aubrey, following their failed logics and succumbing to Chloe’s shenanigans.

Maybe that was what she was trying to do once again. Bring Aubrey closer by the lack of logic in the situation. Confuse her. Make her roll her eyes and laugh. Provoke a snarky response.

But much to her surprise, Aubrey didn’t seem confused at all.

“Yes,” she said, in a shaky whisper.

Chloe’s drunk mind was still taking the answer in when she felt a shiver run down her spine. She kept her stare at the blonde’s eyes.

“Tell me how you want me,” she asked. Her hands running from the small of her back to her ribs, palming it lightly, feeling the soft fabric of her sweater.

Aubrey chuckled but didn’t seem to snap out of her trance, staring right back at Chloe’s eyes.

“I can’t tell you,” she said as she caressed the side of Chloe’s neck. “I don’t know how to. You are the writer.”

The redhead smirked and dropped her eyelids, fuzzing her vision on purpose.

Her voice was raspy when she spoke. “Then show me.”

Aubrey lowered her head and touched their foreheads together, a ruler follower as always. She nudged Chloe’s nose with her own, eyes half closed, uneven breath. She brought the girl’s face closer with both hands and kissed her.

It was so different from the kisses they shared before. There was no contention or resign. It was sloppy with drunkenness and raw desire.

That’s the way she kisses the boys she lets take her to dates and shake her father’s hand, Chloe thought. She always found herself repelled by the type, by their expensive suits and business degrees, but now she wanted nothing but to be one of them.

Chloe pulled Aubrey’s frame closer to her, hands navigating back to her waist and finding their way to her ass and smiled when Aubrey lost the rhythm of their kiss in response.

She guided Aubrey until the back of her knees hit the sofa, forcing her to seat, and straddled her lap, bringing her hands to Aubrey’s jaw and resuming their kiss, gasping as Aubrey’s cold hands found her abs under her clothes.

She kissed and sucked and licked the soft skin of Aubrey’s neck with the eagerness and despair only a drunk person could provide, but found too hard to resist keep kissing her and just found her way back to her lips, curling her tongue inside her mouth and trying to not moan with the way Aubrey was handling her breasts.

“Fuck, Aubrey,” she moaned against her lips. “How can a straight girl be that good-"

“Shhh.” Aubrey kissed her again. She took her hands out of inside the redhead's sweater and used them to guide her hips onto hers, maintaining her grinding onto her pelvis.

Chloe just wanted to yell at her. How dare she to be bossy? But she resigned herself because it was Aubrey Riley Posen, of course she was bossy about sex too. This thought made her pull back from their kiss and look at Aubrey.

Her green eyes were dark, a result of low light and desire. Her hair was disheveled in a state that sober Aubrey would hate. There were red marks on her neck. She was panting. Chloe assumed the fault for all of that, proudly. Her lips were not swollen enough, though, so Chloe resumed kissing and eventually biting the plummy flesh.

“You’re so beautiful. It’s so unfair. How am I supposed to resist you?” Chloe groaned between kisses.

“How am I supposed to kiss you if you keep talking?” Aubrey groaned back, but there was a hint of laugh in her voice.

Chloe broke their kiss again to take off her own top but Aubrey stopped her.

“Let’s go upstairs. All these glass doors and all,” she mumbled, almost sounding sober, getting up and pulling Chloe with her.

But the way she tripped at the end of stairs making them both laugh was the proof that they were just as drunk as they were dancing to The Carpenters.

“No, let me,” Aubrey said as Chloe tried to remove her top once again.

Chloe pecked her lips sweetly as Aubrey discarded the piece of clothing somewhere at their feet, feeling calm for once. She proceeded to remove Aubrey’s own top.

“Shit, why so many clothes, honey?” Chloe complained, unbuttoning the shirt she was wearing under the sweater.

Aubrey laughed at this for some reason and allowed Chloe to pull her back into her hooking her fingers in the belt loops of her pants. She kissed her chin, proud with the way the blonde shivered with the touch.

“I'm obsessed with kissing you,” Chloe said, Aubrey’s breathing hovering her lips. Dizzy not only with the alcohol, but also with the feeling of their skins touching now that their tops were gone. “It’s like, so addictive. So perfect, it makes my head go all-"

“You’re just drunk,” Aubrey said, pushing Chloe into the bed and falling on top of her.

“Maybe.” Chloe laughed as Aubrey's weight heaved on her and they kissed again.

There was something about being that close to Aubrey, something to be written in books and poems. It evoked all her purest at the same time that she couldn't deny her desperate touches driven solely by lust. At the same time she wanted to make Aubrey scream under her touch, she wanted to hold and caress her skin until she fall asleep.

She turned them around and settled on top of the blonde, not resisting not being in control anymore. She took off their jeans, desperate to touch Aubrey, to kiss the little scar on her right knee, to get lost in every single curve of her body. She was determined to make Aubrey moan her name and with smirks hidden against her breasts and the inside of her tights, she did. Several times. There were red scratches down her shoulders and back that she considered to be a prize.

Oh, if only Chloe could describe how Aubrey’s skin tasted she would have a Pullitzer.

Aubrey looked at her with foggy eyes as Chloe pulled herself back on top of her and kissed her lips without hurry. She cupped Chloe’s face with one hand, the other searched blindly for one of the redhead’s to hold, orgasmic afterglow all over her face.

“See? I want you,” she said with a content smile, nearly falling asleep.

Chloe looked down at her with a wide grin and kissed her again, butterflies free in her stomach. She laid by the side of the asleep girl and caressed her cheek, wondering if, in her dreams, Aubrey saw her.

That night, falling asleep beside Aubrey under the eyes of the cold forest on the other side of the window, she was, somehow, closer to happiness than never before.

* * *

When Chloe woke up next morning, Aubrey was nowhere to be seen. She laid there, naked under the covers and eyed her discarded clothes on the floor. Her head was hurting and her mouth felt dry. It took her a couple of minutes to recover her memories from the last night.

“Holy shit,” she hissed.

She turned her head to the pillow and grinned her teeth as she breathed in the smell of Aubrey’s shampoo and punched her side of the bed.

She didn't know if she hated or loved the fact that she could still taste Aubrey.

* * *

Aubrey had gone downtown and she looked weird, Angela told her.

“Is everything alright between you guys?” She asked.

Chloe blinked. “Brilliant.” She lied.

* * *

The thing is: Chloe had been in that situation way more times than she liked to admit.

It was kind of her thing. Overstep intimacy, let herself be driven by alcohol and lust, forget that friends were supposed to stay out of each other pants, eventually stop talking to them because things were too complicated to navigate.

But Aubrey was not a friend; Aubrey was family.

Aubrey was the one who stayed in Barden for Thanksgiving on their first year, because they both had reasons to not go home. The one who baked her a birthday cake next year just because she heard Chloe never had a homemade birthday cake. The one who took her home to spend Easter with the Posens. The one who attended party after party with her, and Chloe knew it was because she wanted her to safely come back home.

Aubrey was the one who went on an unplanned roadtrip in the middle of the week with her because Chloe needed to go to her mother’s grave. Aubrey was the one who knew when to ask Chloe things and when to let her say on her own terms. The one who always silently offered a hug, a cuddle, a warm tea and a company to watch a romcom she hated.

Aubrey was everything she had. The one she wanted and could never have; the one she could not risk.

There was no way she was going to let Aubrey go. She had to make things right before it was too late.

* * *

The hours passed and Aubrey was still gone. Chloe didn’t dare to text or call, afraid she would run away forever.

The hours passed so slowly that she felt like they were trapped in time. A time of uncertainty, of fear, of not knowing the next step.

So she had lunch on her own, reviewed one of her projects, played video games with the kids and helped Mrs. Wyatt and Angela prepare dinner in silence in the kitchen until she heard Aubrey’s car approach. She excused herself and ran to the cabin to wait for her there.

Aubrey had her blue beanie on and that made her smile.

“Where were you? I was worried,” Chloe asked and ran to help Aubrey take off her coat.

“I hadn’t bought the kids anything for Christmas,” Aubrey said, not looking into her eyes.

Chloe noticed the bags she was carrying and dropped them onto the coffee table.

“That’s sweet of you,” Chloe said.

Aubrey nodded vaguely and went upstairs, still avoiding Chloe’s eyes.

Yes, she remembered. There was still a small part of Chloe that hoped Aubrey had no memories of what happened last night. But of course that didn’t happen. She was too smart, too lucid for that.

She stood there, listening to Aubrey’s steps on the mezzanine, feeling nervous about touching the matter. It was necessary, she told herself.

“We should talk about last night,” she said in a tone that Aubrey could hear from upstairs. It was somehow easier to start the conversation not looking into her eyes.

Aubrey’s steps could still be heard, but there was no response. Chloe listened to her on the stairs and then getting near her.

“No, thank you,” Aubrey said, heading to the kitchen.

Chloe felt her insides crumble.

“Bree-“

“We will go to the main house and spend Christmas’ Eve with your family and then go back home and that’s it,” Aubrey said, as if she was narrating a plan to the Bellas.

“So you are ignoring last night?” Chloe asked.

“I am indeed,” Aubrey nodded.

“We don’t have to, we can talk it out,” Chloe said.

Aubrey kept her eyes on the view. “We shouldn’t. If I talk to you right now, things won’t go well.”

“Bree-"

“We just have to fake it for one more day and then we can go home. That’s all.”

“And then we talk about it?”

Aubrey made a face and turned away from her.

“Why are you being like this?” Chloe asked.

She truly believed talking was the way. They could dismiss it as a fluke, a mistake, a funny story to tell their friends one day, even if she didn’t want it to be that way.

“Can we just- please, just wait until we get home,” Aubrey said, looking quite helpless by the glass door of the cabin. “I can’t do this today.”

Something about that plea brought flashes of the night before, when Aubrey looked so sure of her actions. The desire on her voice and the fierce of her moves. The intenseness of her kisses, the strength of her moans. It was not fair that Chloe had to live with an unresolved issue like that. An unresolved issue like Aubrey.

Chloe sighed. “Aubrey I just want to make things right for us. I don’t get why is so hard for you just talk to me-“

“Because I love you, okay?” Aubrey yelled, looking quite defeated. She looked at her boots. “And I know that you don’t love me back because we are different about those things and we are good as friends and we don’t want to change that. That’s fine.” She sighed loudly. “But I love you, Chloe. That’s why it’s hard for me to talk it out. Because I can’t forget about it. I can’t forget that I had – even for a fraction of time - what I’ve been wanting for God knows how long.”

It was there all the time, wasn’t it? With all the exceptions, with all the touches and looks and smiles Aubrey reserved only for her. It was there when she said yes to this crazy idea. It was there when her face twitched uncomfortably every time she saw Chloe crying. It was there, and Chloe talked herself out of believing in what her eyes were seeing every time.

And it was there last night too. Chloe wasn’t alone.

Aubrey loved her, and Chloe could see it now like a string of Christmas lights: the little moments all connected to each other, shining and sparkling. A long thread of them, hanging around their heads, sprawled on every single bed they ever shared, hanging around their tiny apartment in New York, following them like a trail until that moment.

“You want me?” Chloe asked in a small voice.

A flash of memory crossed both of their minds.

Aubrey nodded, looking exhausted, like she had been on a long journey. Chloe just wanted to bring her home.

Then Chloe kissed her. For all the years of wanting. For all the pinning. For all the lost time. With all the love.

And life was never the same.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** _: santa was the nicest to me this year_
> 
> 12-24-2019 5:34PM
> 
> * * *

* * *

> * * *
> 
> **@aubreyrposen** _: Christmas shopping was quite easy this year._
> 
> 12-23-2023 2:29PM

* * *

Aubrey greeted a couple of actors in the foyer as she entered the theater. She hugged Toni, the costume designer, as she was fixing someone’s hat by the wings and stopped by the curtains.

“I want you to look in that direction as you recite the second part of the monologue. Ed is going to try the blue light as you do and the purple one too so please try to not notice,” Chloe told her star. “Yeah, just like that.”

The actress, a middle aged woman with a serious face readied herself on the stage and Chloe got down, finding her seat in the audience and putting her glasses on. She was ready to take her notes.

Aubrey loved all versions of Chloe. The one when she was reading scripts aloud in their living room. The one when she would try to be sexy and ended up being goofy. The one when she tried to be sexy and got it right. The one when she would Facetime her siblings and hear whatever silly stories they had to share. The one in which she would write something and believe in it so much that she would talk about the characters as if they were old friends. But the one who directed her actors with so much care and passion was her favorite. She was the closest to the core of her personality, she was everything that made Aubrey fall for her in the first place.

So Aubrey stood there and watched as her eyes ran through the staged and sometimes paused in a uneventful spot, adding a commentary to her assistant soon after. Then the scene was over and with her remarks, it would reborn, more lively than before until the point it was perfect to her.

“I got to get you home now, ma’am.”

Chloe turned in the direction of the voice. “Bree!” She jumped onto her girlfriend’s arms and pecked her lips. She noticed Aubrey was still in her office’s clothes and probably came straight from work to accompany her on the way home.

It was the end of the evening and the crew had called it a day, Chloe unaware Aubrey had watched part of it.

“Ready to go home?” Aubrey asked, holding Chloe at arm’s length.

“Sure, I still have to pack, y’know,” Chloe said, gathering her things and saying goodbyes and happy holidays to everyone.

“I know, I know who I married,” Aubrey said with a smirk.

“Please put a ring on it before you say it,” Chloe faked annoyance.

“I won’t, you do it.” Aubrey offered Chloe her arm and they left the theater together, heading home for their Christmas break.

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale:** _only one more month to opening night! get your tickets on the link below [link]_
> 
> 12-23-2023 6:34PM

* * *

Chloe and her family found the right balance for their relationship. A couple holidays a year, gifts on birthdays and constant calls. There were plans for everyone – including a still distant Grandma Wyatt – to come to New York for the opening night of Chloe’s play.

Then, all the way home that day, Chloe was telling Aubrey about the Christmas gifts she bought them.

“I bought Violet a scarf because she didn’t complain last year and-" Chloe stopped talking as Aubrey didn’t open their apartment door. “Where are your keys?”

“Here,” Aubrey said, tapping her purse.

Chloe eyed her suspiciously. “And why didn’t you open the door.”

“You should do it,” she said, without looking into her eyes.

“Aubrey-"

“Just open the door, woman,” she laughed.

Chloe picked up her keys and gave her girlfriend one more suspicious look. She opened the door and their apartment was dark.

They moved there a couple years ago. It was at walking distance from Broadway and Aubrey’s office, so they both were comfortable. It had a balcony and two bedrooms. Of course the second one was just a home office since they stopped pretending they didn’t want to share beds every night.

Chloe turned the lights on and was met with a small bark coming from their Christmas tree.

A small Beagle was sitting inside a crate wearing a red bow tie on his head.

“A puppy! Bree!” She turned to the blonde behind her and hugged her.

“Merry Christmas,” Aubrey said but Chloe had already let go of her and headed to the puppy. “Did you like her?” She asked even if she already had the answer by the way Chloe kissed the dog’s little head.

“Her? It’s a girl?” She cooed loudly. “I love her, Bree,” she exclaimed. “I love our baby, I would die for her already.”

Aubrey laughed, closing the door behind her and neatly putting her coat and purse on the hanger. “Are you crying?”

“These are happy tears!” Chloe said, hugging the puppy to the point Aubrey was afraid the little thing would suffocate.

Aubrey came to sit beside them, kissing Chloe’s lips. “Now we are one step closer.”

Chloe looked at her with curious eyes.

“The home.” she waved around. “The job, the person.” She touched their foreheads together. “The children.” She scratched the dog’s head. “One step closer to happiness.“ Aubrey smiled at her.

Chloe kissed her. “No. I am here now. I have been for a long time.”

Aubrey kissed her again, forgetting to complain about the fact that Chloe had kissed the dog before. “I love you.”

“I love you,” Chloe said. “And I’m in trouble because the socks I bought you are terrible compared to a puppy.”

Aubrey laughed. “I guess I won this year. And you can make it up to me by driving all the way to your father’s.”

Chloe gasped. “What about her? Are we taking her? Do we need a babysitter?”

“Of course we are taking her, I promised Wendy,” Aubrey said and picked the dog. “Now please go finish packing.”

Chloe pouted. “But I wanna hold Alice.”

Aubrey blinked. “You can’t name our daughter without consulting me.”

“Well, I thought she was my gift so I can name her whatever I want,” Chloe retorted. “You can pick her middle name.”

“Nobody cares about middle names I-“ Aubrey got up. “This is you trying to distract me from the fact that you need to pack. Go, now. You can’t have Alice until you’re finished.” She took the puppy from her girlfriend. 

Chloe groaned and got up too. She kissed Aubrey on the lips and Alice on the top of the head.

“Oh, Aubrey?” She peaked her head from the bedroom.

“Yes?”

Chloe looked like a kid about to explain she broke the neighbor’s window but it was an accident. “Do you think Alice can be our fake baby? I kind of told them you were pregnant.”

“Chloe!”

* * *

> **@thechloebeeale** _: this is going to be our christmas card [view picture]_
> 
> 12-23-2023 7:45 PM

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> as usual, in december I write.
> 
> thank you for reading, i'd love to hear your thoughts about this one.
> 
> I hope you have a lovely end of the year. hug the ones close to you, contact the stray ones, forget about the ones that hurt you.
> 
> \- with love, sk4di


End file.
